We're talking about smiling.
Let's start with babies.
As you know or may not know
I don't know how many babies you've seen
but babies do it - they smile.
It's a facial expression that
can convey meaning
in a way that--
so many words ...
One -
just like laughing -
We talked about fake laughing -
smiling is the same thing.
It's a behavior
that changes the way you feel.
When you don't feel confident
you may be smiling because you're so nervous
and that's okay.
Even if you're smiling because you're nervous,
smiling will make you feel better.
It has something to do with being able to see it.
If you're smiling usually it's like a yawn
or sneeze - it's also contagious
and it'll cause other people to smile.
When you see other people smiling
that comes back to you as a warm happy feeling
that will then make the fake smile
a real smile.
If you have a lot of public speaking
and you really feel a lack of confidence
and real problems...
and no matter what I'm saying,
nothing is getting to you -
it's all been just tragedy and drama...
Then one of the suggestions that I've heard is:
You think of a memory that makes you smile,
something very happy for you.
Something that you can --
that's connected to you strongly
and when you're in the stressful situations
you think of that memory;
before you start speaking - get happy!
It puts you in the mood to smile.
It puts the smile on your face
and when the smile is on your face
then you're able to make it more real.
Again we're talking about faking it
until you make it.
One of the things that I would like to point out
is not just smiling while public speaking,
which is very important.
As we said - even if you're talking about
unhappy things,
you should still
be smiling.
Because it does keep people listening.
We talked about being warm and being cold-
if you have a cold face on
soon people will stop listening
because it's just--
if you're not interested
it's not going to be interesting for them.
Especially bad news [laughter]
Nobody likes bad news.
Make sure that your have a warm expression
and part of that is smiling.
The second thing is
even when you're talking on the phone
there have been scientific research done
showing the people can tell
(I don't know how) but people can
tell when you're smiling even if they can't see you.
When you're talking on the phone,
especially to somebody in authority, your boss
or somebody who you need a favor from
or you're trying to cheer somebody -
smile when you're speaking.
it has a great effect on the listener.
Knowing that... and eye contact
and I guess there's one more thing
I should say about eye contact and
that is there is a cultural issue.
I know in Korea for example eye contact is not
appropriate in all situations. In some it's okay
but usually not appropriate.
when I first came to Korea to teach kindergarten
there was a -- they had a video
introducing you to Korea. [laughter]
And one of the things they showed was
a Korean teacher yelling at a student,
'Don't you look at me! Put your eyes on the ground !
I'm yelling at you!'
and an American, or a foreigner,
yelling at a student, saying,
'Look at me when I talk to you!'
in Korea we don't look at each other.
It's an aggressive gesture
especially when there's a difference in power,
like a teacher to a young student.
in America, actually, the opposite is true.
In other Western cultures,
you're listening to me =
you're looking me in the eyes.
Please remember that
when you hear me talk about making eye contact.
Maybe if - I don't know, but maybe in your country
you're supposed to be reading
and not looking and eye contact is bad -
but we're talking about presenting to Westerners.
We are talking about making eye contact in,
especially Americans,
in a Western fashion.
So knowing that -
you should be able to
do that and practice.
Today we talked about music.
Let's make our opinion video about music.
What I want you to do is I want you to
think about the question
'What kind of music do you like?'
it's a very simple and common question.
and when you're answering
don't just answer with a general genre.
We mentioned, 'Oh yeah I like pop music.'
Conversation is finished.
Check.
Give examples of the kinds of music you like.
Give examples.
Give a reason why you like a certain sound
or why you don't like certain sounds.
And try to give a recommendation.
Part of conversing or talking to people
in other countries is
their experience is going to be very different from yours.
Giving recommendations is pretty important.
When you're talking about your music,
that you like, you can say,
'Well I personally really like ballads.'
A lot of Koreans like ballads.
I hear that a lot,
but I'm foreigner,
I don't really know what does ballads mean even?
I mean I've lived in Korea for five years,
I know what ballads are,
don't send me information about ballads
but what I mean is it's a genre in Korea
that's not a genre in other countries.
So give an example.
If you give ten examples- it's too many.
I won't remember.
but if you give me one example
and not just the band.
I mean if you love everything by one band
- that's fine.
For example I love almost everything by Wolf Parade.
I could put a link up.
Such a good band.
But if you give a band, give a song title.
and if you're making a video
you can't send them a youtube link,
but you could send in the comments section below
you can write out your answer
and give a youtube link.
Like: Here's the band I like.
Here's the reason I like them.
Here's a link to their song.
What do you (make a question) --
what do you think about it?
Is it your taste, your style?
If it is, great! I have more recommendations.
if not, why don't you tell me
about what you like.
The point is make it as much --
make it your opinion.
Make it a recommendation.
And then make some questions
at the end or even while you're doing it.
This is what I like. What do you like?
The band name is______. Have you heard of them?
I recommend this song.
Do you want me to send you a link?
Remember we're doing this
because one
(listing using hand gestures!)
Because one:
I want you to improve your conversation skills.
Two -
I want you to improve your ability to give your opinion
and three: confidence.
It's all about confidence.
Three is a great number, isn't it?
Try.
Make mistakes.
And keep going.
See you guys next time.
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