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What Is Sexual Fluidity? - Duration: 7:42.
So today I want to talk about sexual fluidity, because this is something I
feel like I've heard mentioned a lot, especially on tumblr during the Ramona
Blue debates, but I don't feel like there's a lot of explanation happening
about what that is, and people seem to be talking about it in a way that implies
they don't actually know what it is. Sexual fluidity is not the same thing as
saying "everyone is bisexual" or "everyone is a little bit bisexual." Sexual fluidity
is a term that loosely encompasses a lot of different ways that people experience
desire. I've experienced fluidity and some major ways in my life, so I wanted to
talk about what it looks like to experience fluidity.
Gather around while I tell you of my romantic and sexual orientation in detail.
When I was a kid, I
had crushes on boys. I remember being in middle school and saying "I can't wait to
get to high school and join the GSA, because I just think that would be so
cool to be a really great ally!" and thinking, "Kind of wish that I was queer."
There are friendships that I look back on now and think, I probably had a crush
on that girl, but my feelings towards guys were not complicated: they were
pretty basic crushes, and they weren't anything that felt confusing at the time.
I knew that gay people existed. I just didn't get that butterflies in your
stomach feeling about other girls. And then I got to high school and I became
really close with a girl who would become my best friend,
and eventually one night it hit me that I at some point had fallen in love with
her. I was 14 or 15 at the time and I was shocked for about one night, and then I
slowly started coming to terms with it and coming out to people as bisexual.
Me and my best friend would start dating and had a very dramatic, tumultuous,
on-again off-again relationship through most of high school. I was so consumed by
this relationship that it took me a long time to realize that I had stopped
really being interested in guys. I was mostly just interested in her. So I
started to come out again, as a lesbian, when I was about 16.
After that relationship ended, I was constantly getting crushes on girls,
swooning over other girls. I would occasionally find a guy attractive, but
it was really rare and it didn't really feel personal. It felt very distant. And
then when I went to university, I started to become really good friends with
someone, I had on them, and we started dating. They
eventually came out as genderqueer, and for a little while, I was kind of worried
about what that meant for my own identity. But it didn't change how I felt
about them, and it didn't change my pattern of attraction, which was by far
mostly towards women, so I didn't change how identified. Years after, that
relationship ended—and this is the part that you probably already know about, if
you know me. I became roommates with a guy friend of mine, and we became very
close, and I was pretty surprised to find those feelings turned romantic. That
roommate was Ron, my partner now, and that's when after IDing as a lesbian for 10
years, I would come out, once again, as bisexual. When I first started having
feelings for my best friend in high school and when I first started having
romantic feelings towards a guy more than 10 years later, those both felt
completely random. It felt like I had no idea what my romantic orientation was.
Like there was no pattern there. Like I thought I knew who I was and then I just
seemed to have randomly taken a left turn and I hadn't been warned at all. But
what looked like completely unrelated events now make total sense to me, now
that I know more about sexual fluidity. Different people have different
capacities for fluidity. For some people, their pattern of attraction doesn't
really change over time, and for some people it shifts pretty dramatically, and
sometimes many times. One aspect to fluidity is person-based attraction, and
that's something that really speaks to me. It's as if this operates in a
completely different system than my usual experience of attraction. Generally,
I'll just see a woman and say "Oh my god, she's gorgeous, I'm attracted to her" and
it's simple, and it's instantaneous, and it feels very just biological, like a
body experience. I can also get crushes on girls from absolutely nothing and
that has been pretty consistent since I was about 15: it's almost entirely
towards women. Which is to say, at least according to Lisa Diamond in her book
Sexual Fluidity, that that is my sexual orientation:
it's my basic biological response, and it has very little to do with what my
environment is. Sexual fluidity is a way to describe how your desire responds to
changes in environment. So for some people, if you go
to a school or workplace that is mostly one gender,
you might start experiencing more attraction to that gender than you would
in a mixed gender environment. For other people who have lower degrees of
fluidity, or who don't experience fluidity, that doesn't really affect how
they experience desire. In my life, I've realized that regardless of my sexual
orientation, I can experience romantic attraction that grows out of intimate
friendships. My experience of falling for my high school girlfriend and my current
partner were remarkably similar: they both developed out of an intimate
friendship, they both seem to contradict my orientation, and when I first fell for
either of them, my attraction followed a clear pattern: intimacy to romantic
attraction to sexual attraction. There was no way to speed through or skip that
process. I had to come to terms with it while I was happening. When I first fell
for my best friend in high school, I knew I was in love with her, but I couldn't
imagine kissing her. And that was something that changed over time. But it
wasn't a process that I could speed up. It was a change in my attraction that
happened gradually. So that has just been my personal experience, but I wanted to
clarify a few things. My number one thing to clarify would be: don't just say
"sexuality is fluid," because it's not for all people. It's just one factor of
attraction that some people experience, and some people experience to different
degrees. And it's a terrible thing to do to tell someone what their attraction is,
what their orientation is, what they're going to feel in the future. If someone
tells you what their orientation is and how they identify, you believe them and
you affirm that, and you never try to argue with them that "maybe it could
change because sexuality is fluid!" You don't know that about them. They know
that. And honestly, even if it does change over time, that is none of your business,
and it doesn't mean that it retroactively changes how they felt and what
their reality was before that. So, no, sexuality in general is not fluid: some
people experience sexual fluidity to different extents. Which I know is not as
snappy! But it is more true. It's also something that is unpredictable. It's
something that happens organically. Saying that sexual fluidity exists and
that sometimes some people's patterns of attraction change doesn't mean that you can
force someone to change their orientation. That is not the equivalent. The take away,
really, is that sexual and romantic attraction is a huge, complex,
multifaceted topic. And I highly recommend reading Sexual Fluidity by
Lisa Diamond if you're interested in this, even though I will warn that it is
pretty cissexist. I'll link my review down below for more. Let me know what your
thoughts are about this, because I hear a lot of people say "sexual fluidity," but I
don't really see it discussed. Which is partly why it was so confusing and
upsetting when it happened to me. I think this is an important topic to discuss
because it can really help people who are experiencing complex, shifting
patterns of attraction, and let them know that you're not alone, and there's nothing
wrong with you, which I think we all know is a really important thing to hear,
especially when you're feeling really vulnerable and afraid, which is
definitely how I felt both times when I experienced sexual fluidity in a major
way in my life. So that's all for now, but let me know your thoughts in the
comments, and thank you for watching!
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061017 - Duration: 24:26.
BANG!
And this weeks show is underway
Keyakitte Kakenai
Hello, we are your hosts Sawabe
I'm Tsuchida
onegaishimasu
And over there are Keyaki-chan
po
ko
po
ko
PO!
I just noticed
Nagasawa-kun is sitting next to her
[ Oda stalker? ]
kowai
This week she's drastically cut the distance between them
That's pretty scary
Quickly I'll announce what's on today's show
Keyakizaka46 "This makes me laugh so hard" Gran Prix
All the members, out of all the inside jokes they have
they'll announce the joke that kills them every time
The member that's nominated will go up to the stage
and perform the joke
How about this show? Sounds good right?
It does, its just that
these girl are always giggling about something I don't understand
That's not true at all
[ Captain reveals the truth ]
Like in the dressing room right?
But the dressing room is different, you'll hear a lot of strange voices shouting WAH
[ Strange dressing room voices? ]
You hear strange voices in the dressing room? That's wrong
These are the really funny things that someone is reccommending
Its different from something everyone might find funny
Even if it isn't that funny, this will be good
This makes someone laugh really hard
Up first
the inside joke that makes Moriya laugh uncontrollably
Oda Nana's
impersonation of Nadal-san
So this one
Its so funny
the face she does kills me
Her face
face
So then if you could make your way to the stage
As you'd expect from Oda-sensei
Showing zero hesitation in walking towards the stage
That's the dignity of a master showing
For the person who recommended this, once you think the joke is over
in this case its Moriya
please press the button when she's done
So let's get started. This is Oda's
impersonation of Korochiki's Nadal-san
dozo
I've gone mad
[ Completely satisfied ]
That got a pretty big laugh
from the members
How was that Moriya?
That made me happy, haven't seen that in awhile
Its been awhile so Oda, how'd it go?
I need a little something extra in the first "I've gone mad" part
to make it more like Nadal-san's
She's always looking to improve!
Could you show us that again?
I've gone mad
AH!
That wasn't it?
You can't get your ideal "I've gone mad"
She's not satisfied with that one
Seems that way
Definitely once you're happy with it
Yes, that's right
Once you've got your "I've gone mad" worked out
I'd like to come back and try it
That girl is incredible
And next
the inside joke that makes Nagasawa-kun laugh hard
Saito's kiss throw
This one's yours Nagasawa-kun
Up to now
of all the kiss throwing I've seen, hers is the most passionate
passionate?
I don't think I've ever seen a kiss throw that sounds like that
And Saito does this?
When I'm joking around with the members, I'll do this
Which members have had this done to them?
Its a lot of them
Neru
What's it like?
It makes me really happy
[ Something to be happy about? ]
So now, this makes Nagasawa-kun laugh hard
Saito Fuyuka's passionate kiss throw
wrong~
That's not it?!
Do it again!
One more!
Close the curtain for a moment
Nagasawa-kun, close it!
[ Do-over ]
That's not it?
What was wrong?
Her nostrils are supposed to expand all large and then the kiss pops out
Her nostrils flare out and the kiss is lightly thrown from her mouth?
She turned it into a TV version!
That was the TV version
That's not the one Nagasawa-kun?
completely different
That was completely different
Can you do it Saito?
I need a member right in front of me so that I can do it
Ok, then Neru
YES!
She likes kiss throwing
Don't we need her up front?
What?! Why are you back here?
What are you doing here!?
Up front. To the front of the stage Neru
Being at the front of the stage is just as embarassing for Neru
She just wanted to meet Fuu-chan
Now she'll face Neru
and give her the full kiss throw
onegaishimasu
That's perfectly acceptable
That's good stuff
Neru, what's wrong?
First time seeing it up close
Are you delighted?
The kiss throw for the fans
How was it Nagasawa-kun?
Satisfied..that was completely satisfying
[ Displaying true talent ]
Even the members were screaming "That's the one!"
But still
when I was back there asking for a member to stand up front
at that moment one of the staff-san said
"Who do you want? Nominate someone you like"
Ah of course
I thought Pe would be good, but Neru was already back there
[ Fan invasion! ]
Neru, that has to make you a little sad
Well, I guess excuse me then
"I guess excuse me then" she says
And next
The joke that makes Neru laugh
Ozeki's
On [W-Keyakizaka no Uta]
the skip scene
This is yours Neru
For the filming of the music video
we all got in one line and everyone started skipping
but then something strange happened
among all the members
there was some mumbling
Like "Isn't that weird?"
I didn't notice
when we all watched the finished video
Everyone was like "Who's that?"
Makeup-san also said something
and it got brought up at the handshakes
The fans asked you about it?
We have that video
so let's all take a look
[ Ozeki ]
Eh? Was that her?
That girl is going off
That's just jumping
kowai
I was told to just get into the song
that's what the director-san told me
So I did that part in my own way and unexpectedly
everyone else did it normal
Ozeki, that was you getting into the song?
hai
jumping like the Maasai tribe of Kenya
Can you skip then?
I can pretty much skip
Try it then
kowai kowai kowai kowai kowai
One more
Try that with a smile
With a smile
Looks like she enjoys that
There's one more person who really can't do it
Nanako can't do it
She can't. If you would Nagasawa-kun
Go ahead and come toward us
How about one more?
One more. One more
And next
The joke that Saito Fuyuka loves to laugh at
Nagahama's "What did you just say~"
This is yours Saito
When we're talking
suddenly her face changes
and she says "What did you just say?"
its the way she says it
That's better for a conversation
Its the move right before she says it
Now then
This makes Saito Fuyuka laugh hard
Nagahama Neru's
"What did you just say~"
Neru actually, out of all the members
I like Pe-chan the most
Eh, what did you just say?
So that's it
I get that one
Its the wrinkles above the nose
These horizontal wrinkles right
But first of all
I make my eyes like Golgo13
Eyes like Golgo
That really does look like that
And I flex this area and say
"What did you just say"
Yes, that's it
I'm good at this?
[ Golgo Sawabe ]
"What did you just say"
You're not allowed to upstage Neru
Yours is better
Can I have this one?
Give me your "What did you just say"
"What did you just say"
And that was what
makes Saito laugh but
Ozeki
also has something that makes her laugh
Saito's "What did you just say"
Well show us then
so this one
For me, Fuyuka's "What did you just say" kills me
Is it different?
Fuu-chan looks over her shoulder and says "What did you just say"
She's added movement to it
But Neru's is the original
I probably did this to impersonate her
And now, this is what makes Ozeki laugh
Saito Fuyuka's
"What did you just say"
"What did you just say"
That's the one
That's a strange face
Where are you flexing?
Right here
What is that?
Which muscles are you using?
Just a little adjustment and you'll have a Mori Shinichi-san face impersonation
That's Mori-san's face
Could you say [ Ofukuro-san yo ]
Try that one
Ofukuro-san yo
Well she doesn't know the song
its a generation thing
That's different from Neru's version
Its different
Neru puts more into her eyes
Saito uses the sides of her nose
that's where her power is
May as well have Ozeki line up and try doing it next to them
She's not part of this
Have Ozeki line up
Ozeki?
Ozeki
That's horrible!
Ozeki what are you doing? That's way off
You can't adjust your face one part at a time!
[ Searching for the sweet spot ]
And next
the joke Kobayashi loves
Shida's impersonation of makeup-san
Which one?
So Kobayashi, which one?
Keyaki's makeup-san
there's a makeup-san who maintains a cool expression
when that person gets flustered
When that person gets flustered?
Who? You mean XXX?
[ The real name should probably be kept secret ]
During filming of our music video
everyone's in a rush to shoot, and this person comes running at us
when we're not getting filmed, this person goes beserk
so I did this impersonation during that
So that was the situation this is from
And now what makes Kobayashi laugh
Shida Manaka's
impersonation of makeup-san
atarappu atarappu
That's messed up
That is messed up
You've really done it
Hold on, hold on
One more time
Its better this way right?
I really don't think this is funny
So then once again
Shida Manaka's
impersonation of makeup-san
atarappu atarappu
There aren't any makeup-san's like that!
What kind of makeup-san is this?
I have no idea
What was that?
It was raining at the location
and they wanted to shoot it quickly
makeup-san was running around
and usually this person acts cool and doesn't talk
but now this person is running up to you
Next girl "atarappu"
What are you saying?
atarappu
That's the nickname among the members
The person is called atarappu
and this person doesn't say or do this
The person doesn't do that
I was trying to tell the members just how much this person was freaking out
[ Has the giggles ]
Is that funny?
Yes, it is
She's really into this
One more time
atarappu
What is this?
And next
The joke that Watanabe Risa loves
Oda Nana's impersonation of Buruzon Chiemi-san
I love that one
Could you do it?
The long version?
Long version? You have a long version?
You have a short and long version?
And here's the joke that makes Risa laugh hard
Oda Nana's
impersonation of Buruzon Chiemi
domo
I work effectively
with a fulfilling private life
I'm a career woman
For all those unamarried depressed women working
if you don't go out and hunt
surely you must know you'll never find your man
ah
Then I have a question for you
flowers
do they go out and find their bees?
ah
If you don't look
you'll just keep waiting
Risa is laughing so hard.
That made Risa laugh uncontrollably
She really has the giggles
Look at her, she's so delighted!
That much?
How was that Risa?
That was so funny
I got nervous
And next
The joke Yone-san loves
Nagasawa's
Its Nagasawa's
Suki! Suki! Skip!
This one's popular
What's the deal? This is really popular
Previously with HKT-san
we did a show together
HKT-san danced on Futari Saison
and we danced on HKT-san's Suki! Suki! Skip!
Seeing Nagasawa-kun dance to that song
it was so funny
I couldn't stop laughing
Is this just because Nagasawa-kun couldn't do the dance?
But I practiced all night for it
[ She took it seriously ]
The song Suki! Suki! Skip!
now I want to see the normal version
That's true. At first
Suzumoto, can you do it?
Now that's a great face!
And all I had to do was call your name
Well that's because
your dancing is really excellent
First Suzumoto will show us how the dance is done for
HKT48s
Suki! Suki! Skip!
suki ni naranakya~
Suki ni naranakya~
nani mo hajimaranai~
That was good
Normally it looks like cute idol dance choreography
THE idol
No way you could make that look weird
And now this makes Yone-san laugh hard
Nagasawa-kun's
Suki! Suki! Skip!
suki ni naranakya~
Suki ni naranakya~
nani mo hajimaranai~
Kind of looked like a puppet at the end
Yone-san, was that it?
But it was more at the end
it looked normal, but its the last part that makes me laugh
This part right?
That's it
That's the one right?
[ Aware she's doing something weird ]
That's funny right
the way her legs flail around
What am I doing wrong here?
What is it about that part?
I can't fix this
And next
The 2nd joke that makes Yone-san laugh
Suzumoto and Risa's impersonation of Nemo
Nemo
So this one
In Finding Nemo, what was that?
Darla
Who is Darla again?
The scene when the girl goes to the dentist
The crazy girl, she was human
They do an impersonation
of her that really makes me laugh
They both impersonate the girl
Do you two do this often?
The peak time for that movie has passed
A lot of jokes do have a peak time
Suzumoto and Risa's impersonation
of a Finding Nemo character named Darla
I'm a piranha
I live in the amazon
Fishy!
Fishy! Wake up!
Fishy! Wake UP!
Fishy! Fishy! Wake up!
Ah, there was the scene in the movie
The look of people who perfectly executed their specialty
They look like "I didn't even do anything"
How was that Yone-san?
kawaii~
kawaii
Its so cute and so funny
Well that was good. How was it Risa?
That was fun
You liar!
[ Huge lie ]
You don't look like you enjoyed that
And we have another one from Yone-san
what makes Yone-san laugh
Suzumoto and Risa playing "Found the heart"
Amazingly enough its the same members doing this one
They're both saying "No! No!" though
During that same time period
they had this found your heart game
Its better if we see it?
It would be better if you just watched
If the two of you could get ready for the found your heart game
Can you do it?
hai
Well then
onegaishimasu
Now then please watch along
Suzumoto and Risa
play found your heart
heart!
heart~
Over there
heart!
What was that?
What was that!?
Found a bunch of hearts
Yone-san
YES!
The masters
so you found
a bunch of hearts?
These costumes have no pockets
so really
they're lacking heart
[ Insufficient heart ]
Is that it?
They meant that to be funny, but maybe they were really tired
[ Total exhaustion? ]
They're all tired
And next
the joke that makes Ishimori and Saito Fuyuka laugh
Rika's monster walk
The members seem to know this one
Ishimori, this one's yours
Its really cute
Rather than call it funny, its more moe
Seeing it, its something that's really cute
Now then, lets get to it
Watanabe Rika's
Monster walk
kawaii~
I see
I get that
kawaii kawaii
What was it like doing that Rika?
I wasn't expecting anyone to say that
so I was unprepared
unprepared
But you did that well
hmm
You both thought that was cute right?
And next
the joke that makes Captain Sugai laugh
Oda and Shida's
Oda Nana at ZIP! Spring festival
this is pretty pinpointed
This is yours Sugai-sama
They let us do a collaboration
but there was a timing for coming out on stage
But then what happened to that timing
so then Oda mistook
the time to come out and the staff had to stop her
And after the show Shida recreated that moment
Shida played the role of staff-san
Oda Nana played herself coming out at the wrong time
This recreation kills me
I couldn't stop laughing
The joke that makes Sugai laugh
At ZIP! Spring festival
she messes up the stage entrance
and the staff has to restrain Oda Nana
Eh! Hold on, not yet!
That's not right
Sugai-sama, that's a problem
Even though she told me she knew when to come out
she still came out at the wrong moment
So they told you when at the start
It was like can I go now? And I took off
Wait wait wait wait wait!
That's crazy
Why'd you want to get out there so bad?
Everyone in the crowd was waving their towels waiting
So how was that?
Well we've seen a lot
And what stood out in your mind the most?
Its the image of Shida impersonating makeup-san
makeup-san
atarappu...atarappu
Let's end it with the makeup-san impersonation then
[ Today's MVP? ]
We'll end the show with Shida's impersonation of makeup-san
onegaishimasu
atarappu atarappu
See you next week!
bye bye
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