I got 99 problems and none are Iatrogenic
ACh hyperpolarizes cells, [cranial] nerve ten ish
Ironically your heart rate spikes when tone's more sympathetic
Beta 1 receptors give a f** k if Nor-'s in epinephrine
Stroke Volume per minute, CO I'm overflowin' with it
P-waves- not like pool parties- it means the SA node's lit
Cardiac arrest no hits, Larson, Game six
Stenosis makes your exit valves all narrow, blood's like 'move, b***h!'
Afterload increases ESV, so where's your blood go?
I really hope you didn't say arteries or arterioles
It's an open system you know, this here is cut-throat
Kris makin' songs around the world, that's word to tug boat
Stealin' signals like the '17 Sox, I'm sorry bruh But still we didn't get to 100, no tachycardia
Every day is a stress test, no metabolic cart But too much cardiac ischemia will make your heart farct
Two abbrevs for PDA, both I don't play tho One stopped being cool in middle school, the other one, prenatal
Way less blood in pulmonary arteries and veins, y'all Right ventricle blood goin' awol, could be fatal
Pericardium : heart :: blanket : Linus Coronary veins go to the coronary sinus
Then back to the right atrium, cue the Purkinje fibers This line is reserved for tasteful a joke about anginas
Turbulence from fatty streaks, tunica adiposities Resistance to flow increases with length and blood viscosity
Flow rate's directly proportional to velocity Before you go to test me, you better test your hypotheses
Artifacts from an infarct, that's the necrotic part Decrease in pressure from closing exit valves? dicrotic arch
Brady just means slow, like when bowser drives the Mario Kart Isovolumetric - change in pressure with a closed heart
Afterload pushes back flow like it got a false start It goes up standing in empty spots where you swear your car's parked
Or when you shake fists like gifs of Arthur Aardvark But not for me I'm sober and cool as hell I got bars, narks!
When PR intervals keep gettin' longer until the beat drops That means the signal's weak sauce, squatting makes its knees knock
You can call it delay, Mobitz-1 or AV block Mind your Ps and Qs, between 'em you can see Wenckebach
Constant ratio of P to R, type-II-Mobitz Ventricles will tell the signal come back later, you go fish
Heme groupies wanna associate when you're O-rich Frank Starling Junior, make the money stretch like I'm preload, b***h
Full conduction block, signal's murdered in the third degree The atria and ventricles got their own beats, separately
With a bundle branch block, the Rs all look like Ms, B And strokes can happen when you lack the blood flow to your dome piece
Positive inotropic agents, up contractility cyclic AMP improves calcium permeability
Four chambers, no trilogy, heart stays workin', trill O.G. Whack MCs aren't phantom beats, I don't feel you, and you're not real to me
if your shirt's wet get vasopressin, and a new beefy T Extra pacemaker from above creates PSVT
And if there's two regular sinus beats for each PVC It's not polygamy homie, it's actually called trigeminy
Ouabain and digitalis both keep calcium present Might not be the worst cause of ST segment depression
Pericardial effusion makes large waves look less-than AV node and AV bundle signals- PR Segments
Coronary arteries, smart, the first place blood's spent A ventricle that skips over its atrium, Bundle of Kent
LGL's Wolf-Parkinson, don't ask where delta waves went But both PR intervals are short like they just paid rent
"Which way do you wanna face when your brains hit pavement" Way too much potassium will make your damn T-waves tent
Hide your kids and hide your P-waves, head to the basement Right hypertrophy and chest pain seen with deep vein s**t
Torsades V-Tach, hope it's curable with magnesium ST segment elevation, well that's just easy, dumb
Possible due to, some crazy high -kalemia, Or tissue your heart is bound 2, Peri-card-Yeezy-um
You'll probably also see a-fib with your emboli ST segment depression that usually means some heart has died
Hold my bundle branches, in other words hold fasciculi Y'all already know the beat's sick; I got you thinkin' why
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