If they have plants, I would get a couple of cacti,
which is plural for cactus.
Sure, I knew that, yep.
I didn't know that, somebody corrected me.
I was like back the (beep) up.
Who corrected you with cacti? I hate that person.
A Dutch person, a Dutch person.
Oh, god. Europeans love to correct me.
Your husband's Dutch, right?
He is. Gross.
I know, but his (beep) tastes good.
True, true.
He tasted Mile's (beep). He knows what's up.
What are you gonna do? We got drunk, shit got out of hand.
You never know what's gonna happen with Mrs. Buteau.
That's true. Just like these stale pretzels.
Absolutely.
Just salty and filling.
Yep.
What's up, everybody.
Welcome to Stupid Questions with Chris Distefano.
I'm with Michelle Buteau, actress, comedian.
Yes.
She's got a show called Late Night Whenever.
It's a dope cool podcast. She hosts it.
I'm making check, I'm making checks.
What else you got?
I got titties. I like Rose and humus.
Is that you just lifting my titties?
They are that heavy.
They are, yes. I haven't felt it,
but they look heavy. They look nice.
Do you wan tot feel it? Go ahead.
Uh, is that-
It's okay. It's okay. Just feel it.
Are you telling me to do it?
Yes. Do it. Just feel it.
Oh, wow. That is nice weight.
They're heavy, yeah.
If you could shower in any breakfast drink,
what would you shower in?
Oh my God. What would you say?
Mimosas on my titties all day.
Wow, interesting. Are you serious?
You want to bathe in that brunch shit.
Oh, gets the party started.
Started. We got to go to brunch together.
Here's a stupid question.
What's the strangest thing you've ever bought or seen
at a convenient store?
Oh my God, a convenience store?
Yeah.
You know what? I'm so glad you're asking me these questions.
I saw this one convenience store.
Where was it, like upstate New York? Ok.
It was a tampon that is specifically made for alcohol.
What do you mean?
What do you mean specifically made for alcohol?
It was a alcoholic tampon.
Oh, that's how you're getting drunk?
Yeah, without your breath stinking.
It's just for women or it's for men?
What do you mean?
Live your life, girl. I don't know you.
Wow, Christopher.
I don't know flexible you is.
That is weird. I've never seen anything quite that weird
at a convenience store.
Well, you weren't looking for tampons.
If you could switch places
with another comedian, who would it be?
Oh God.
The first person that pops into my mind was Joan Rivers.
Yeah, that's a good one.
Because when she had her late night talk show
and everyone shitted on her,
I'd love to go back in time and be like, "(beep)."
Also, like I watch Whoopi Goldberg on The View.
I don't know if she's high.
I don't know if she's wearing a bra.
I don't care. She is so smart.
I know that she has a Japanese toilet.
Interesting.
I feel like if I had a Japanese toilet cleaning my bum,
in all the right ways, nooks and crannies and crevices,
I might be smarter too.
I guess I could be Joy Behar
I sound like her. We have the same voice.
I would just put on a wig, and then I'm Joy Behar.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
That's your drag alias.
That's a good ... That's a stupid ...
Drag questions.
I don't think it's stupid. I think it's beautiful.
I think it's beautiful too.
I'm just kidding. I know.
I love a sorry broke white guy.
Did you have a good time here, Stupid Questions?
Is that a stupid question?
It can be stupid, but I'm just looking for an honest response.
No, I had fun. I had fun You had fun?
No, I had so much fun. It's nice hanging out with you
like not in the back of a comedy club waiting to go on.
Yeah, we got your stupid gift, two stupid gifts.
Most people just give one, but you got two.
Are you talking about my tits?
Yes. First, this is a bottle of Rose.
Oh my God.
Because we know how much you love Rose.
I love Rose.
And then, you always say "hay", so there you go.
It's cow hay.
This is so-
Hay.
Authentic. Hay.
Hay. That gift is for you.
Hay and Rose, and it rhymes. See you later.
Bye.
Is this real Rose?
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