[ECON GOD ADAM SMITH] Ladies and gentlemen, you coulda been anywhere
in the world tonight, but you're here with us in New York City.
Are you ready for a policy meeting, huh???
The issue on the table: John Keynes' plan to assume national debt
and stimulate aggregate demand.
Friedrich Hayek, you have the floor, sir.
[HAYEK] Freedom of the market without government control
Coordinates your actions, so the 'conomy can grow
These are wise theories, classicals quote 'em
Don't act surprised, you guys, cuz I wrote 'em
Ooow, but John Keynes forgets His plan to boost demand assumes national
debts Now, take a guess, if his stimulus crashes
Keynes will run away as our economy collapses
[KEYNES] Not true!
[HAYEK] Ooh, if the shoe fits, wear it
You put the government in debt, then force businesses to bear it?
Uh!
Check again, my friend If you crowd them out, businesses tend not
to spend
Supply side, we build jobs with tax breaks We create.
You give politicians money like hotcakes Your financial plan relies too much on demand
And it's too many damn pages for any man to understand
Stand with me in the land of the free And keep our money 'way from Keynesian inadequacy
Look, if we run your theory, we just create more inflation
And no one gon' approve of economic castration
[ADAM SMITH] Thank you, Mr. Hayek
Mr. Keynes, your response
[KEYNES] Hayek.
That was a real nice declaration Welcome to the present, people study my equations
Would you like to join us, or keep waiting For the nation to recover while our currency's
deflating
If we assume the debts, the 'conomy gets An new line of credit, a financial diuretic
- How do you not get it?
If we keep spending imperative The nation gets a boost.
You'd rather give it a sedative?
I've got a headline for the papers: "Hey neighbor.
You're unemployed 'cause he can't pay for labor."
"We build jobs with our plans.
We create."
Yeah, keep ranting.
Your theory's about as broke as the banking
And another thing, Mr. Scottish Enlightenment Don't lecture me about the crash, your theory
heightened it You wanna save all our cash?
That money's stuck in the banks If we don't spend then our economy tanks
Mister Freddie H., an impediment to the government Decadent—you get in the way of Keynesian
betterment Classicals, you waste all our money to coddle
businessmen Wait for the long run?
We'll already be dead by then
*music off* Sittin' there useless as two shits
Hey, turn around, bend over, I'll show you where my shoe fits
[ADAM SMITH] Excuse me!?
Hayek, take a walk!
Keynes, take a walk!
We'll reconvene after the Depression.
This meeting is adjourned!
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