Pizza change the way I understood my son's autism
autism entered the vocabulary of our household four years ago when my son Leon got his official diagnosis on my 32nd birthday
on that day I wrote an aching hearts or letter that shared my grief and worries about my son's diagnosis
my husband and I cried part of an worried about how we go on that somehow to your past and in that year we read dozens of books
about autism and tried to navigate all the services we needed to help are buoyed
we spent a lot of time and money chasing cures and feeling like we weren't doing enough
by the time my 33rd birthday rolled around things were still tough
Liam struggled to communicate and he bit and scream to show his frustration
my husband stumbled his way through a PH D program my youngest son entered the terrible twos and I worked full time to support us that
hope and laughter were creeping back into our house
to celebrate how much could change in the year my husband and I went to the Milwaukee art museum on my birthday slash Lyons
diagnosis day I saved my to get stabbed and my friend made it into a pendant which I still
wear when I need a reminder of how much can change in the year
and so another your past and in that year I began learning more about narrow diversity
and that adults with autism
and we began seeing a different path for our son than the grim road that unfolded before as on the day he got his diagnosis
on my 34th birthday
I wrote a column for the autism and asp are jurors digest and mused
the game of life with a Ast is not one of wins and losses
it's not one great a mom dad caregiver or child who pays sweats and leads the most Wayans
it's not won his competition and comparison serve any useful purpose
this game is like the games I play with Liam
it's about cool operation connection engagement
and having fun and so the attitudes in our house slowly shifted
we were working with Liam
not against his autism
and so another your past and in that year
we learned how to support leon's interests
we tried and failed and many therapies but a few stock our lives fell into rhythms that felt normal
and on my 35th birthday I was writing a novel and didn't want to write about autism
the diagnosis that had nearly broken us three years earlier wasn't such a big a deal
Liam was justly am and we loved him fiercely
so we had a small party and went to the park which brings us to this year
last Sunday I turned 36
that means it's been four years since Lyons diagnosis
I can't believe that much time has passed remember how long four years of seemed in high school
and here's all I want to tell you about what happened on my birthday this year
Liam ate pizza and its are really really big deal
but what so important about pizza pretty much everything for UC four years ago we heard that
a gluten and Gary free diet would surely IMS autism
and so we stopped feeding Liam pizza
is very favorite food
we stuffed him full of supplements control does every calorie and watched him for changes lee and eating pizza
sure we saw some positive GI affects along the way
but he didn't magically stop being autistic
and so this year we celebrated with pizza because we're in a different place than we were four years ago
so often a symbol of autism is a puzzle piece a symbol that some autistic people and disability
advocates disapprove of because it implies something is missing or incomplete
I used to have a puzzle piece bumper sticker on my car
that this year I removed it because it no longer symbolizes autism for me
now all four years after the diagnosis and goalie piece of pineapple Lanham pizza is the
real symbol of autism acceptance in our household
these days where no longer looking to cure our son the other where now embracing his
difference and trying to help in succeed in ways that are best for him
we've stopped pushing to make him normal
for example I've finally accepted the fact that sitting in a classroom desk all day is not the reality for him and that's OK now all
were letting him be his loud silly
smart bouncy totally engaged artistic self
we're teaching him in ways you can learn we're listening to what his behavior of words can tell us and we're more connected as a family
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